One would think I could learn...

Before married life, I was happily ignorant social graces. Being single meant that I could cook what I wanted and eat it anywhere in the apartment. And cleaning meant scaring the roaches out of site before guests came over and if anyone ever offered me something I liked, they certainly did not have to ask twice!

I have since learned about the 'Offer Three Times' rule. Apparently if someone offers me something that I like, I have to make them offer it to me three times before accepting.

For instance, while visiting my fiancee (now wife) at her home in the Philippines her father offered me a plate and gestured to the buffet. Me, being hungry and the only white man there, gladly took the offered plate and the opportunity to actually do something other than stand there wondering if anyone was talking about/laughing at me.

Weeeell, I found out later that my bride-to-be was highly embarrassed by my actions. Yep, I should have politely declined her dad's orders and then made him repeat them at least two more times.

Sooo, fast forward 12 years.

Last night I was running some errands and called the better 1/2 to ask if she wanted a shake or something. She did say no. After arriving she saw that I actually did buy her a shake (going on the premise that getting her something she did not want was better than not getting her something she later decided she might like). Anyway she twice more refused to take the shake.

I on the other hand finished my drink and decided to polish off the unwanted shake, without first discussing this possibility with the wife.

About 1/2 hour after I started in on the shake, it turned out that she did want the shake.

So, I get in trouble!!!

I followed the "Offer the damn thing 3-times rule!" but I forgot the caveat that states, 'if the person to whom the item is being offered is your wife, the 3-times rule is voided and the heretofore unheard of 4-times rule is now in effect.'

Who knew?